Children all over America raised their tiny voices in a shrill cry of joy recently, upon learning that Marlene Krauss had resigned as director and chairman of Woonsocket-based Summer Infant, a company that designs, markets and distributes “health, safety and wellness” products for children. Summer Infant, as reported on this blog, had been implicated in a scandal wherin their crib monitor were found to be broadcasting signals received from space-based NASA satellites (no joke!) “Now we can finally be free to grow and develop to our full God-given potential without undue corporate and governmental interference,” said three-year-old Trevor, a spokesman for a support group for survivors of the diabolical, Orwellian brainwashing campaign.
But seriously, folks, we have no idea as to the reason for Marlene’s resignation, ie. as to whether she was forced out or just decided to spend more time with her family. But she can’t be too pleased about the loss of income. As far as we can figure out, she was being paid 125,000/year as chairman, and $220,000/year with $1500/month for travel and up to half of her salary each year as a cash bonus for her job as executive vice president of product development (and probably she got a raise when she became director of the company). Marlene also was apparently cashing out her stock in advance of her departure.
Coincidentally or not, Marlene’s departure coincided with all the eviction notices that were sent out to Chelsea Hotel tenants. Though I doubt that she’s going to make up much of her income by squeezing late-payers, I guess every penny counts. More significantly, Marlene is going to have a lot of time on her hands now, and if we’re lucky, maybe she’ll spend some of it with us here at the Chelsea. By her own admission she’s a hard worker, and doesn’t need much sleep. Sound like anybody you know? Now maybe we can finally get somebody to stand at the desk from 6 in the morning until 6 in the evening and manage this place properly.
Finally, Marlene, we recommend that you set up one of those baby monitors in Elder and Tilley’s office. They certainly have been running a rogue operation lately, and we feel they are desperately in need of adult supervision. — Ed Hamilton
Living with Legends 
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